


Deadman

by eightprince



Category: B.A.P
Genre: Alternate Universe - Vampire, Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-26
Updated: 2017-11-26
Packaged: 2019-02-07 06:45:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,111
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12835548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eightprince/pseuds/eightprince
Summary: in which Himchan's a vampire, trying to get by





	Deadman

**Author's Note:**

> HELLOOOOOOOOO i really left this thing for dead wow
> 
> i really missed uploading my writing on a regular basis because i love reading the comments i get on them, i read them all and they make me happy (yes, i heard you, a dragon prince series is in the works :^3)
> 
> this piece in particular was supposed to be for halloween but i procrastinated and im drowning in essays for uni, so happy really late halloween!
> 
> also this talks a lot about disordered eating, just a heads up!

There’s a lone red rose laying on Yongguk’s porch step.

As he lets Tigger out to go pee, he examines the rose at his feet. For some reason, the rose reminds him of when the girls at his school showered him in flowers because they liked him so much, just like those bad boys in slice of life cartoons.

That was over ten years ago.

Now that he’s almost thirty, people usually don’t leave flowers on his porch. Unless they’re the bratty little kids from across the street, except the flowers they leave are torn up, and they leave other...unpleasant things (like small animal guts).

With a roll of the eyes and an exhale through the nose, Yongguk bends down to pick up the rose for a closer look, only to prick himself on one of the thorns.

“Shit,” he winces, dropping the rose and putting the pricked finger in his mouth. With his free hand, he picks up the rose again, this time being more careful with where he holds it.

It’s a gorgeous rose with morning dew on the petals, and it gives off a soft and delicate scent, kind of like bubbles for a bath.

He scans his yard to see who left the rose here, but there’s no one here. No one except for him and his dog. 

It’s kind of creepy.

There’s a pair of eyes somewhere watching him, and he can feel them burn into his skin. He can’t see them, but he knows that they’re there. He thinks he’s being watched, and it makes his skin crawl. He takes his finger out of his mouth to call Tigger.

“Tigger, c’mon,” he says, “Let’s go,” and the dog is more than happy to run back inside. It’s almost like Tigger felt like he was being watched as well. Yongguk lets the matter go and goes back inside, closing and locking the door behind him.

This becomes a daily routine.

Yongguk wakes up at around nine in the morning, and every time he lets Tigger out, there’s always a rose sitting on the porch. This time, there’s two, and they look like the same rose from yesterday. He picks up the rose, he pricks his finger on the thorn, sucks the blood out of the cut, and goes back inside with Tigger.

The feeling that he’s being watched becomes more and more intense as each day passes, and he always lets the matter go, no matter how much it bothers him.

The next day, there’s three roses, the day after, there’s four. He pricks his finger on each one, every single time. It’s become repetitive and annoying. Those pair of eyes are watching him again, but he always lets the matter go. If he wakes up six feet under tomorrow, that’s on him. 

It’s like he has some kind of secret admirer.

Or perhaps he has a stalker.

On the fifth day, when Yongguk lets Tigger out, he’s surprised (and a little disappointed) to find that there isn’t a rose lying on his porch. 

It seems like his “secret admirer” or his “stalker” got bored of him and moved on. He’s not a very interesting person. He stays home when he’s not working, and his idea of fun is sleeping or watching porn. He lives alone, he’s more introverted than the rest of his friend group, and he does pretty much everything alone.

Not that being introverted is a bad thing or anything. Some people prefer to be alone, and Yongguk is one of those people.

He does other things too, like making music, and he’s been taking up painting lately. Those are just some of his hobbies, and he only does it when he isn’t tired (which is pretty often).

When Tigger’s finished with his business and runs back inside, Yongguk follows behind him, closing and locking the door behind him. There’s a light gust of wind that follows after, and it’s strange because it’s the middle of spring where the heat rises and the wind dies down.

It’s like someone ran past him.

Yongguk doesn’t think much of it. Just like the roses, he’s quick to let the matter go. Speaking of the roses, he kept each one as decorations. He went out and brought vases and put two roses in each vase. 

He admires them with a small grin on his face. He’s always liked flowers. He works at a craft store not too far from his house, and he specializes in floral arrangements. Plenty of customers there say that he doesn’t look like the type to work with flowers and children, and he always laughs it off with a gummy grin.

They say that probably because of his appearance: his long curly hair that covers the majority of his face sometimes without his bobby-pins (a little girl said that he looked like a poodle, and it stuck with him ever since). He’s constantly brushing his hair to the side, and without his bobby-pins, he looks like a mop. He’s covered in tattoos and piercings, yet here he is, working at a craft store.

He stretches his arms out before going back to bed. As he walks past his bed, something reaches out from underneath the bed and grabs at his ankle.

Whatever it is, or whoever it is, it has a good grip on his ankle, and its nails are digging into his skin, drawing blood. Watching the blood trickle down his leg and onto the hardwood floor, Yongguk begins to hyperventilate.

As he struggles to get his ankle free, the grip tightens, freaking him out more. The hand yanks his ankle under the bed, taking him down to the floor. He scrambles to grab anything to fight back with. There’s a broken pencil on the floor, some shoes, some of his Tigger’s toys, and a dildo. Imagine getting hit in the face with a dildo.

All he can do is to continue to yank his ankle free and pray he doesn’t get dragged under the bed. If he does, he’s pretty much done for.

“Are you scared?” A voice asks from under the bed. The voice is deep and raspy.

“N-no,” Yongguk stammers out after a short pause.

“Oh? I can smell your fear.”

There’s another short pause before the voice says, “It’s a pleasant smell.”

“What...what the hell are you?”

There’s another pause as Yongguk continues to get his ankle free. After a while of struggling, the voice loosens its grip and eventually lets go. Yongguk quickly backs himself into a corner as he calms himself down. Even though he was “trapped” for less than five minutes, sweat makes his bangs stick to his forehead.

“Please...don’t,” his voice is there, but it’s not there enough. 

There’s fear in his voice when he wants it to assert some sort of dominance. This is his house, and no one can just show up and grab his ankle and expect him to be okay with it. Unfortunately, he’s too nervous to assert anything.

“Close the curtains,” the voice says.

“Huh?” Yongguk’s voice jumps a few octaves.

“Close the curtains.”

Yongguk swallows the lump in his throat before standing to his feet. His legs are shaking as he reaches for the curtains.

“Do it or I’ll kill you.”

Yongguk makes a weird noise at the threat. He quickly closes the curtains shut before sinking back down onto the floor.

“I...I did the—“

A low growl leaves the voice’s lips as it climbs from underneath the bed. Claws first, it drags them along the floor, leaving stray marks. Its head comes out next before its body. It, maybe he, whatever he is, he’s built like a human.

His hair’s a vibrant crimson, as crimson as the roses in the vases, and he’s dressed in all black, as black as Yongguk’s hair. His eyes are as yellow as the sun, it seems. They flicker brown before flickering back to yellow.

The choker on his neck clings to him tightly. The cross charm on it jingles as he moves, making a small “clink” sound. His lips are a dark plum color. He bites down on them and licks them as an indicator that he’s very interested in what he sees.

Yongguk can’t help but cower in fear as the man stands before him looks down on him. He opens his mouth to speak, but sound doesn’t come out. 

“Are you still scared?”

“What...what do you want from me...?”

“I want you to answer my question.”

“I’m not scared.”

“You’re a liar. I can smell it.”

The other man, whatever he is, he grins as he eyes Yongguk up and down. He bites down on his bottom lip again before kneeling down before him.

“You have really pretty eyes,” he comments, tilting his head to the side to get a better look at him, “I like you a lot. I think you’d taste heavenly.”

He’s pretty up close, Yongguk thinks, but he’s also super pale, and there’s scars on his hand and on the side of his cheek.

The other man leans in Yongguk’s face. The tiny sound of bone snapping makes him jump, and his breath hitting his neck makes him whimper.

He smells like flowers with a hint of death (if Yongguk could describe it), it’s...odd.

The man’s heavy breathing abruptly stops, and he pulls back to look Yongguk in the face.

“I forgot,” he mumbles, slowly shifting his eyes to the side, “I gave up eating humans.”

Yongguk pushes the other man away, going back into the corner he was in a few moments ago.

“What the hell are you?” This time, Yongguk’s tone is assertive.

“Is it not obvious that I’m a vampire...?”

“A vampire, huh...” Yongguk sucks his teeth, “Like in the movies? You’re here to kill me?”

“No, not like in the movies...fortunately. I’m trying to give up the whole killing thing,” the vampire’s eye twitches, “And it’s...not going so well.”

“Why’re you here, then?”

The vampire walks over to Yongguk, and kneels before him again.

“I want you to help me.”

Yongguk raises his eyebrows, “Out of all the people you could’ve picked, why did you pick me—“

“Can you stop asking so many questions?” The vampire raises his voice in annoyance, “I just...I really need help.”

Yongguk flinches when the vampire raises his voice, “But why’d you pick me...?”

The vampire exhales, “It’s just...you seem like someone willing to help other humans...I saw so myself...”

 

The vampire’s super awkward now, as if he wasn’t trying to sink his teeth into Yongguk a couple seconds ago.

“You follow me around?”

“N-no! I mean—It’s what I do—we do. We stalk our prey before we—“

“You just said you weren’t trying to kill me.”

“I’m not—“

“You called me your prey.”

“I didn’t mean it—this is such a mess—“

“Listen, if you’re trying to kill me, can you just get it over with?”

“I don’t want to kill you. I need your help.”

“Wait, so let me get this straight,” Yongguk stands to his feet, “You’re a vampire who follows me around, I’m assuming you leave the roses on my porch, you—“

“How’d you know about the roses?”

“You can’t make it more obvious.”

The vampire’s face is as red as the color of his hair. He goes back to crawl under the bed to hide.

“Hey, hey,” Yongguk says, grabbing hold of the vampire’s coat and yanking him out, “Get out from under there. I’m talking to you.”

The vampire yelps as he drags his claws along the floor again.

“Please leave me alone,” he whines.

“You’re the one who broke into my house in the first place, you weirdo.”

“Please don’t call me that—“

“What am I supposed to call you, then?”

“By my name,” the vampire. shifts his body to face Yongguk (who he can’t even look in the eye), “...It’s Himchan.”

“Himchan, huh?” Yongguk says, “Explain yourself.”

Himchan looks at everything in the room, except for Yongguk, as he gathers his thoughts together.

“I’m a vampire,” he starts, “I’ve been one for a long time. I stalk humans before I eat them. Lately, I’ve gotten sick of eating the same thing over and over...so I’m trying to cut down on my intake, but it’s really hard...I get cravings, and I can’t help myself, so I need someone to help me.”

“...How’d you get in my house? I can’t believe my dog didn’t even notice—“

“You leave the back door unlocked sometimes.”

“...Okay. What about the roses?”

“I leave them to let my prey know that they’re mine—I mean, I leave them to let others know that I’m watching.”

“Hmm. What about the scar on your cheek? And the one on your hand?”

“They’re from the sun—“

Himchan watches in horror as Yongguk yanks open the curtains, letting the sunlight back in the room. He hisses loudly as he crawls under the bed once again.

“What’s the problem?” Yongguk asks, nonchalantly.

“Anyone with a brain would know that vampires are sensitive to sunlight...”

Yongguk raises his eyebrows again because he has concluded that Himchan is a pretty pathetic excuse for a vampire. He’s more attractive than most (he assumes), but damn, he’s hard not to feel sorry for.

“Why don’t you just give in to your cravings?” he asks, closing the curtains.

“As much as I want to, I can’t,” Himchan’s voice is small.

“Come on,” Yongguk taps his neck, “You can do it right here. I’ve always wanted to be a vampire.”

“Really?”

“Nah, I’m just kidding.”

“Then stop tempting me.”

“Well, what else are you going to eat?”

Himchan nearly chokes on his words, “Human food.”

He pokes his head out from underneath the bed. His face is back to its normal pale color.

“God, fine,” Yongguk sighs, “I’ll help you. I’d feel bad and if I didn’t.”

“Am I...really that pathetic?”

“Well—“

Himchan frowns, “I think I’ll be staying under there for most of the time that I’m here.”

“You really think I’m going to willingly let a vampire stay in my house?”

“...You’re bleeding.” 

“Don’t change the subject.”

“No....you really are...”

Yongguk glances down at his ankle. Himchan’s right, there’s blood running down his ankle. How come he couldn’t feel it?

“You can lick it, if you want to,” he snorts.

“I really...don’t want to...”

“Sure you don’t,” Yongguk, who is oddly calm about bleeding out from his ankle, goes into the bathroom to clean up his leg.

Himchan stares at the puddle of blood on the floor. His cravings tell him to go for it, but his morals say that that’s disgusting and he needs to love himself more. He wants to be “pure” again. Eating humans all day long isn’t how he’s going to achieve such purity.

One little taste won’t hurt though, right...?

With one finger, Himchan reaches for the pool of blood and scoops up just a tiny bit to put in his mouth. The taste is sweet, and it gives him goosebumps. It’s like he went to heaven. He wants more of it. The sensation that comes with it is enough to make his eyes roll into the back of his head.

He’ll scrap the purity thing for now as he scoops up more and more on his fingers until he starts using his hands, then he crawls out from under the bed to use his tongue. He needs more of this, he thinks, but he can’t have any. But his body’s telling him that he needs more.

He can’t. He really can’t.

“Alright,” Yongguk says, coming back from the bathroom, “Like I was saying—“

Himchan’s startled when he looks up at him and hears Yongguk’s voice, and the look of shame and guilt takes over.

“I couldn’t help it,” he mumbles, “It tastes so good.”

“I didn’t ask...I /guess/ you can stay under the bed if it makes you comfortable. Just...don’t scare my dog.”

“...I’ll, uh, try not to,” Himchan says with a small smile, trying to hide how embarrassed he is right now.

—-

Himchan’s sitting at the dining room table in front of a bowl of instant noodles that Yongguk made (Himchan swore it was some kind of magic). He doesn’t know what they are nor does he know what they taste like, but they look appetizing.

“Humans eat stuff like this, right?” He asks, staring at the bowl.

“Yeah,” Yongguk replies, “I, uh, live off it.”

“I’ll keep that in mind. How do I eat it?” 

“Chopsticks,” Yongguk holds up a pair of basic wooden chopsticks and snaps them in half, “Like this,” he uses them to scoop up some noodles.

Himchan’s mesmerized. He copies Yongguk and uses the chopsticks almost like he used them, and slurps up the noodles in his mouth. At first, they were salty, and it made his face scrunch up, but the aftertaste is good. Overall, they’re delicious, and Yongguk can read it on his face.

“Are they any good?”

“Mmm,” Himchan’s eating more and more until the noodles are gone and all’s left is the makeshift broth. The noodles leave warm feeling inside him, and it feels pleasant until it turns into nausea.

“That...that was really good...” he says, slowly.

“I’m glad you liked it,” Yongguk smiles a small smile, “Did you want more?”

“I don’t think I can eat anymore—“ 

Before they know it, Himchan’s throwing the noodles back up onto the floor, and Yongguk’s disgusted as he stands there and watches.

“I thought you said you liked them—“

“I couldn’t...keep them down...I’m sorry...”

“You don’t need to apologize,” Yongguk makes a weird face, “I mean...I guess noodles aren’t for everyone.”

Himchan hangs his head in shame. Trying not to give into his bloodlust and switching to human food is going to be so much harder than he thought. He has time to adjust. It’s not like he has anywhere to go.

“You’re cleaning that up though,” Yongguk says, going back upstairs.

This becomes a daily routine, just like the roses.

Himchan crawls back under the abyss from which he came from (also known as under Yongguk’s bed, who knows what’s under there), he disappears for an hour or two before coming back to the house. Yongguk waits in bed for him. Himchan always comes back at around three in the morning with guilt written all over his face, as if he killed someone. 

“Where’d you go?” Yongguk asks, sleep filling his voice.

“I had to go see someone.”

Yongguk squints, “You’re a fucking liar.”

Himchan raises his eyebrows in surprise.

“I’m telling the truth,” he insists, “I went to go see someone.”

“You smell like blood.”

“...Like most vampires should.”

Yongguk sits in silence and stares at him until he cracks, just like a father catching his teenage child sneaking out at night. The guilt’s eating Himchan up inside, and Yongguk staring at him makes him unbelievably uncomfortable.

He inhales through his nostrils and exhales through his mouth, “God. Fine. I went hunting.”

“What’d you eat?”

“Humans.”

“Dude, I knew you were lying. You can’t lie to me like that. I’m not stupid.”

“I know, I’m just—I haven’t eaten anything that I could keep down for a week and a half.”

“I’m not stopping you from hunting,” Yongguk sits up in bed, “It’s just, I don’t want you lying to me."

“I’m sorry.”

Yongguk sighs, “Whatever. How many did you eat?”

“Three.”

“Holy fuck.”

That guilt Himchan’s feeling gets worse and worse, “The number will only get higher if I don’t control myself.”

“So what do you want me to do?”

“Be my voice of reason and tell me to stop.”

Yongguk goes quiet for a second.

“I won’t enable you anymore, then,” he says, quietly, “I’ll try not to, at least. I’m making you eat human food.”

“...Okay.”

This becomes a daily routine, just like the roses. Yongguk wakes up and feeds Himchan anything he can find, from sweet stuff, like the sweets the little old ladies at the craft store give him, to spicy stuff, like leftover kimchi from lunch, only for Himchan to throw it back up and beat himself up about it. 

“Don’t eat it if it makes you sick. Take your time.”

“Okay—“

Yongguk lets Tigger out for the remaining amount of time he has left before going to work. He goes to work, leaving Himchan to wallow in self pity and Tigger to mind his own business.

Yongguk comes back home and tries to comfort Himchan to the best of his ability. When Yongguk goes to sleep, Himchan’s animalistic instincts call out to him, and sneaks out to hunt.

One human, two humans, three, four, five, the number gets higher and higher as the week goes on. He loves the pleasure he gets after eating, and the blood always tastes so sweet, but unfortunately, the pleasure is only temporary and turns into guilt.

He goes back to the house, and Yongguk is usually awake and waiting to scold him (or if Himchan looks really pathetic, he comforts him).

Some nights, Himchan goes out to hunt, other nights, he stays home and goes hungry. There’s this little voice in his head that’s telling him to kill Yongguk and eat him for himself, but as much as he really wants to, he can’t.

He has morals, and besides, Yongguk’s supposed to be helping him. Not to mention his blood tastes really really good. He often thinks about how it gave him goosebumps and made his eyes roll into the back of his head when he first tasted it. He wants more. He needs more, he thrives off it, but he can’t. Yongguk’s a good person. He’s got a nice personality and he’s got things to live for. And he’s very...handsome.

Himchan’s eaten attractive humans before, but they don’t compare to Yongguk. He’s handsome in an ethereal kind of way. If Himchan was religious and prayed to God every night, he’d pray to Yongguk. He really can’t kill him...he shouldn’t. Can he? No.

Slowly, but surely, he’s driving himself insane.

“Hey, uh,” Yongguk taps Himchan’s shoulder, “You look a little...stressed out.”

“Oh, I /am/ stressed,” Himchan says, “But also, I’ve been thinking about something. Would you be mad at me if I turned you?”

“Turned me?”

“Into a vampire.”

Yongguk purses his lips before speaking, “We’ll see when we get there.”

“...Okay.”

“Why? Were you thinking of giving in already? You’ve been clean for a couple days now.”

“No....I just. This is going to sound really bad, but if for some reason, I turn you, whether it’s by mistake or intentional, I’m giving you permission to eat me.”

“...Uh,” Yongguk lets out the driest laugh possible, “I think I trust you enough for things to not escalate like that. Like, eating people really isn’t my thing, you know what I’m sayin’? It isn’t /me/.”

Himchan frowns.

“I hope it won’t have to come to that,” he mumbles, “But consider it a request if it does.”

“Yeah, okay.”

Feeling uncomfortable with the conversation, Himchan goes back and crawls under the bed. Yongguk’s right, he’s been clean for almost a week, and it’s agonizing. All he’s been eating is crackers because that’s all he can keep down. They’re salty and bland, and hunting is way better than these nasty crackers, but it’ll have to do.

A few days turns into a few weeks without a drop of blood, and a few weeks turn into a few months without the taste of flesh on Himchan’s tongue.

He nearly bit Yongguk twice within a week (Yongguk insists that he’s making some sort of progress), and at this point he can’t stand to be in the same room with him for longer than half an hour. Yongguk’s aware of this. It would be hard not to be.

Giving up on the bloodsucking thing and transitioning to human food (these nasty ass stale ass crackers are driving him insane) is taking a toll on his body. He’s always hungry for more.

He’s spread out on the floor, watching the rise and fall of his own chest, as Yongguk sits on the bed, focused on his laptop.

“You look tired,” Yongguk comments, looking up from his laptop.

“I am.”

“You look hungry.”

“I /am/.”

“There’s still some leftover crackers in the cookie jar, I think—“

“You know that’s not what I want.”

Yongguk closes his laptop and sets it to the side, “I know. I can’t do anything about it.”

“All you have to do is tell me to stop.”

“I do just that, don’t I? What else do you want me to do?”

“Then why am I always so hungry?”

“...I don’t know how to answer that.”

Bite marks are embedded in Himchan’s skin. He tried biting himself to get the same effect as biting someone else, but it didn’t work. It was more of his self destructive behaviors. They itch, so when he digs his claws in them to scratch them, they bleed. He looks like a mutt with fleas.

Pathetic.

The voices keep telling him to give in, because he’s been craving it for months, but he can’t. When your stomach is completely empty, it starts to hurt, and at this point, the pain is unbearable. It’s sickening. He’s driving himself crazy.

Yongguk can’t help but feel pity.

“Please, just do it already,” he mumbles.

“What?”

Yongguk pulls down his shirt collar to expose his neck, “Just get this over with. I can’t watch you destroy yourself like this anymore.”

“I told you, I can’t.”

“You know you want to.”

“I want to—“

“What’s stopping you?”

“You are. You have a life to live, you have things to live for, and I can’t take that all away from you for my own selfish reasons.”

“...It’s okay. I promise.”

Himchan exhales as he watches Yongguk climb off his bed and onto the floor with him. Yongguk gives him a reassuring smile, “I’m totally okay with a vampire sucking my blood.”

“Are you sure?” Himchan asks, but it doesn’t sound like a question. It was more like a statement.

“I’m sure.”

“Are you really sure?”

Yongguk takes a shaky breath, “Yeah.”

“You’re going to regret this.”

“So be it, then.”

Himchan gets a good grip on Yongguk’s shoulders, digging his nails into his skin. Blood trickles down his shoulders and onto Himchan’s hands, and he allows himself to lose control.

At last, he finally snaps. 

“I’m really sorry,” he whispers before sinking his teeth into Yongguk’s neck.

Yongguk lets out a strained grunt and squeezes his eyes shut. The pain’s pulsing all throughout his body, like getting ran over by a sixteen wheeler truck. He’s tearing up as Himchan’s practically digging into his neck, but it’s for the better, right?

Himchan’s missed this sweet taste. It’s been months since he last had it. It gives him goosebumps again. He moans as tastes more and more of it, tightening his grip on Yongguk’s body.

“Do...do I taste that good?”

“Hmm.”

Yongguk can feel himself getting dizzier and dizzier as Himchan tastes more and more of him. He grabs hold of Himchan’s hand, his grip weak and loose. He tries to intertwine his fingers with Himchan’s, but Himchan isn’t interested in that. He’s more worried about feeding himself. With a loud gasp, he pulls back from Yongguk’s neck, loosening his grip on him and letting him fall back.

Yongguk’s breathing is heavy and ragged, and everything’s blurry. It looks like there’s two of everything. Two of Himchan.

“You’re not dying, are you?” Himchan asks, standing to his feet. His demeanor changed. His eyes glow a golden yellow.

“I...I don’t think so...”

“Good,” Himchan steps over him to go downstairs and out of the house. Before he can go too far, Yongguk grabs hold of his ankle.

“Where...where’re you going...?”

“I need more.”

“So you’re leaving me here to die?”

“You said that you weren’t dying. You’re shifting. You’re one of us now.”

Yongguk purses his lips and lets go of Himchan’s ankle. He gets a flashback to the day they first met. It was like this, only the roles were switched.

“...Unless you want me to kill you.”

Yongguk shakes his head.

“I didn’t think so,” Himchan leaves the room. The sound of steps creaking and the door opening and closing scares Yongguk a little. He asked for this. He consented to this. He doesn’t regret it, but he may when he’s digging into Himchan’s body with his teeth in an hour.

Himchan’s deep voice lingers in his mind. He doesn’t regret this.

Not just yet.

What he does regret however is not being able to help Himchan out more. He said a number of times that he was starving or he was sick, but Yongguk never knew what to do.

He didn’t know how to care for vampires then, and at this point, he’ll never know how, unless he does some research on shitty blog forums ass deep in the Google search results. They’re all probably full of garbage and inaccurate information. 

Like Himchan said before he left, he’s one of them now.

Himchan stepped out to hunt, and the thought of it makes Yongguk’s little fangs pop out with a click. They’re smaller than he had hoped when he runs his tongue along them. He hopes they’ll get bigger in size as time goes on.

Would Himchan bring anything (or anyone) back? God, he hopes so. 

It’s only been about an hour, and Himchan’s usual hunts last for two to three hours. Yongguk came to this conclusion after numerous observations.

He’ll sit up and wait for him.

—-

Yongguk wakes up to an uncomfortable burning sensation all over his body, as if he was set on fire. His eyes snap open when he realizes that the sun is up and the curtains are wide open. The first thing that comes to his mind is that Himchan left him open out of spite, and Yongguk was too busy doing whatever to notice.

“Shit,” he hisses, “Shit, shit, shit,” he scrambles to get up and close the curtains, tripping over things on the floor as he does so.

With a groan, he rubs the fresh red marks on his skin. They sting when he presses hard enough on them, and his whole body aches. He assumes that he’s a full fledged vampire now, because of his skin burning and because of this new teeth (the teeth are pretty cool, he’s not gonna lie).

He’ll have to soak in cold water later, but it’s around the time where he takes Tigger out to pee.

But he’ll burn to a crisp. 

Yongguk shuffles over to his closet and pulls out the thickest blanket he can find. He wraps it around his body as he shuffles down the stairs. Tigger’s already waiting for him by the front door, eagerly wagging his tail.

“Sorry,” he mumbles, grabbing a pair of sunglasses sitting on the coffee table.

As he opens the door and Tigger runs outside, the sunlight still burns. The sunlight isn’t as harsh as it was before, now that he’s wrapped up in a blanket, but he can still feel his skin burning. He keeps the door open and goes to sit on the steps in the house, keeping an eye on his dog.

So this is what Himchan goes through on a daily basis, huh? Yongguk isn’t sure if he can do this. No, he still doesn’t regret his decision. He did this with a good conscience.

...Right?

After Tigger’s back inside, the first thing Yongguk does is close all the curtains in the house and set the lights to its dimmest setting. He learns that artificial light doesn’t burn as much as the sun after placing his hand under the light of one of his lamps, but he’s not taking any chances.

He looked under the bed to see if Himchan was there. All that was under there was some of Tigger’s toys and the same dildo from a few months ago. He’s nowhere to be found. Yongguk assumes that he went all out on some kind of killing spree because he hasn’t tasted blood in so long.

He doesn’t blame him.

Thinking about Himchan hunting makes him hungry. He’s never tasted blood before, except for that time in elementary school when his tooth fell out and all he tasted for half an hour was his own blood. Thinking about that makes him hungrier, so hopefully Himchan’ll bring something (or someone) back for them to share. 

He probably won’t. He’s stingy.

As Yongguk’s sitting in the cold water in the bathtub, he prays that Himchan’ll be waiting for him in the bedroom. He constantly peaks out the doorway to see if he came back, but he’s never there. He sinks deeper into the tub.

It takes a good week of waiting and waiting for Yongguk to realize that Himchan will probably never come back. He was some kind of dine and dash. He even waited at work for him, wrapped up in scarves and sweaters in the middle of spring. Customers would ask him if he’s doing okay, and he claims that he’s just sick with a smile.

He’s starting to regret this.

Yongguk never really had a big appetite. His idea of a big meal is fast food or a bowl of instant noodles. The more human food he ate, his hunger for blood grew. Fortunately for him, he’s still able to digest his noodles. If he couldn’t, he’d probably starve and die. That’s pretty much all he eats.

There’ll be a point in time where he won’t be able to keep it down anymore, and he’ll have to start eating humans. He isn’t looking forward to it at all. But the more he ate, he more his blood lust grew, and he couldn’t take it anymore. 

So he went out to hunt.

His first victim was some woman he dated in high school. She came to the craft store he works at in search of yarn, without knowing that he worked there. He recognized her, and they started talking. As much as he didn’t want to, he took her out to eat, took her home, killed her, and ate her.

She didn’t even scream or anything. It’s like she sat there and let him dig his teeth into her. Maybe that’s why he regretted it afterward. He did get some sort of pleasure out of it, though. When he wiped the blood caked on his mouth with the back of his hand as he watched her lifeless body, that’s where his high began.

He got hungrier the longer he stared down at her.

“I need more.”

So he went and got more. He hated it.

He ate more and more until he couldn’t stand to be in the same room with humans without wanting to sink his teeth into them. Things would’ve gotten ugly if he wasn’t able to control himself. 

There was an accident at work where a child cut their finger with some scissors while cutting paper, and the sight of blood made Yongguk lose his damn mind. He tried to tend to the child’s injury without making eye contact with them, and it was extremely difficult to do so. But he gave the child a (forced) smile and made sure everything was going to be okay.

He went hunting later that night.

His daily routine is much different from Himchan’s before he turned him. While Himchan stayed home and starved, Yongguk gives into his cravings and goes hunting for anyone, really. He has morals, though (which basically means no children on the menu). He’s submissive. He always has, and he always will be. 

Time flew by and no one has gotten suspicious of him, so he doesn’t get anxiety from that. However, he gets anxious thinking about Himchan. He comes home after a long night of hunting to be greeted by Tigger, who always waits for him in the living room.

He knows that Yongguk’s been acting different, but he still gets fed, so he doesn’t see a problem.

Yongguk carries him upstairs like a baby (he’s capable of climbing the stairs), and sets him on the bed. As he walks around the other side to climb on, someone grabs at his ankle.

He makes a weird grunting noise, and Tigger starts barking.

The hand looks familiar. 

“Don’t freak out,” a familiar voice says, “It’s me.”

“Himchan,” Yongguk growls, yanking his ankle free from Himchan’s grip.

Tigger jumps off the bed and dashes into another room when Himchan crawls from underneath the bed.

It’s been months since Yongguk last saw him.

“You look....nice,” Himchan comments, dusting himself off.

“Why’d you decide to come back?”

“Is it a crime to visit an old friend?”

“I’m not your friend.”

Himchan lets out a breathy chuckle, “Ouch. But anyway, how’re you holding up with the whole, y’know, vampire thing?”

Himchan said that as if they were discussing each other’s sexualities (something like “So how’s it being gay? How do you take dick?”) Yongguk almost forgot about the whole vampire thing.

“You did this to me,” he mumbles, “I’m always hungry, and it’s your fault.”

Himchan furrows his eyebrows in a comical way. He looks like someone told him a bad joke.

 

“I told you that you would regret it,” he snorts, “But you still let me go through with it.”

“I let you because I didn’t want to watch you suffer anymore—“

“Would you be better off if I killed you?”

“...No,” Yongguk’s voice gets soft.

“I told you, you had a life to live, and I tried talking you out of it, but you were so dead set on me biting you. I even told you that you could’ve eaten me after I finished—“

“You left before you gave me the chance to.”

“...That’s true, but—“

“Why’d you leave, huh?”

“Because,” Himchan breaks eye contact with him, “We’d probably try to kill each other...and I was so hungry...”

“So why’re you back?”

“Because I wanted to check up on you...and let you go through with what I said.”

“Uh. As much as I’d love to tear you apart myself,” Yongguk tugs on his shirt collar, “I’m, um, tired, so.”

Yongguk would be more than happy to kill Himchan himself, but then he’d be alone forever. He’s not ready to be alone. He has Tigger, but it’s not enough.

He drove himself crazy trying to distance himself from others. After the accident at work, he called in sick frequently, he rarely went out, before, his skin tone was like a caramel color. Now he’s gotten pale. All he’s worried about is eating and Himchan. Now that Himchan’s back, he’s worried about eating him.

It doesn’t make sense.

Himchan came to the conclusion when he left that if he was dead for good, he’d achieve the purity that he starved himself for all those months ago. He wants Yongguk to be the guy to go through with it.

Yongguk stares at him, and it makes him uneasy like it always does.

“You don’t have to stare,” he mutters.

“You look like you’d taste really good.”

“I suppose so,” Himchan gives him an awkward grin, “But are you going to—?”

“No.”

“I see.”

An awkward silence hangs in the air, and Himchan’s getting uncomfortable again. He exhales and turns on his heel to walk out of the room. As Himchan leaves the room, whatever that was bubbling inside of Yongguk, most likely anger, begins to boil over.

He clenches and unclenches his fists times, watching Himchan walk down the stairs. Every time the stairs creak, Yongguk’s eye twitches. With heavy steps, Yongguk goes and follows him. Himchan turns to face him at the bottom of the stairs with a cocky grin.

“Changed your mind?” He asks.

Yongguk growls as a reply.

“Speak up, I can’t hear you.”

Yongguk’s growling gradually grows louder and louder, as if he was some kind of animal.

“You’re kind of sexy when you’re agitated with me.”

That bubbling feeling, that anger, that hunger, it’s boiling over, and he’s feeling sick. He has to eat to survive. 

Himchan’s fucking with him because he knows Yongguk’ll change his mind. After watching him tear that woman apart limb from limb, he’ll change his mind. He’ll wait for it as long as he needs to.

“You did this to me,” Yongguk hisses.

“I told you twice now that you’d regret it.”

Himchan’s right, they both know that he’s right. It sends Yongguk over the edge. He finally snaps like Himchan wanted.

He jumps down the flight of stairs to pounce on Himchan, taking him down to the floor with him. He has no time to react. Yongguk doesn’t waste time getting down to business. He sinks his teeth into Himchan, harshly sucking on him. Gasps leave Himchan’s lips as he wraps his shaky arms around Yongguk.

“I knew it,” he gasps, “I knew you’d come around.”

Yongguk pulls back and goes back in repeatedly. He wants this to be as painful as possible.

“That—That feels so good. Do it again.”

“Shut up!”

Himchan lets out a drawn out cry. He never thought that being eaten would feel this good. He can feel Yongguk’s teeth in his neck, he can feel his nails sinking into him, he can feel blood (or something like that) gushing out of his body.

Sensational.

Yongguk pulls back to take a look at Himchan’s face. He looks blissful.

Euphoric. 

“You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”

“I am. I really am.”

“Well. I’m glad I can make eating you such an experience for you,” he sinks his teeth back in him.

Himchan lets out small cries when Yongguk sinks his teeth into him, his neck, his face, his arms, there’s bite marks everywhere. He’s currently floating away on cloud nine.

Delighted.

“You’re—you’re so hot,” he whimpers.

“Shut up.”

Loud, hungry sucking sounds fill the room as Yongguk moves lower down on Himchan’s body, leaving a trail of bite marks. Himchan’s mumbling things that are audible for Yongguk to hear, but he chooses to ignore them and focuses on eating and stripping him.

“Does your prey talk this much while you’re eating them?” He asks, “Mine don’t even scream. Not even when I ask them to. It sucks.”

“I just...I just want to enjoy this...because after this...I’ll be pure again...”

“That’s what you wanted, right?”

“It’s all I’ve ever wanted.”

Since Himchan can’t be human again, his best bet was to become “pure”. He wanted to rid himself of his bloodlust, which led him to starve himself when he couldn’t eat human food. Yongguk did little to nothing about it except telling him to stop like he asked, which led to Yongguk telling him to give in, which led to Himchan giving in.

Yongguk is different. He never put up a fight with his cravings. If he was hungry, he went for it, which basically led to where he is now.

Himchan’s vision is getting hazy and his breathing’s getting raspy. 

“Thank you,” he whispers, “For doing this. For everything. Thank you.”

“Pipe down, I’m busy.”

Yongguk can’t explain what Himchan tastes like. He tastes sweet like everyone else, but he has this other taste to him that makes Yongguk crave more. Probably because he’s a vampire.

“Would it,” Himchan’s voice is soft, “Would it be bothersome to ask you to kiss me...?”

“What?”

“Kiss me. I left you those roses for a reason—“

Yongguk’s more than happy to oblige. He pulls back from Himchan’s neck and presses his lips on his, grabbing a fistful of his hair as he does so. The kiss is rough and sloppy, just like when he was digging his teeth into him.

“You’re so good to me,” Himchan gasps when he pulls back, “I really...don’t deserve it.”

“I’m only doing what you asked. I eat, you become pure. It’s a win win situation.”

“Hmm...”

With that, Yongguk goes back to biting him.

Himchan opens and closes his eyes over and over again. He wants to watch Yongguk eat him, but his vision’s getting hazy, and he can barely breathe.

“You’ve ruined me,” Yongguk mumbles into his neck, “You know that, right?”

“I know.”

The way Himchan responds is blunt and straightforward. He’s willing to admit that he ruined Yongguk’s life a million times if necessary, but in a way, Yongguk asked for this. He’s easy to take advantage of.   
Manipulative.

“You can’t kill me this way,” Himchan mutters.

“You really want me to kill you, don’t you?”

“That’s...the whole point of this.”

Yongguk pulls back from Himchan’s neck to look him in the eye. There’s this look of guilt in his face with a mix of desire, meaning that he really wants this. Or that he needs this, rather.

“Wooden stake,” he says, “I brought one...for this.”

“Wooden stake, huh?” Yongguk smirks, “You’re really serious about this. Where is it?”

“Left it...on the table,” Himchan points to the chunk of wood lying on the coffee table. It’s a makeshift stake that he spent a long time making. The tip is sharp for a reason.

Yongguk reaches over to grab the stake, examining it closely. Himchan’s initials are engraved on it, along with something written in Hangul.

“Purity”

Himchan has neat penmanship, and it’s clear that he spent a lot of time carving the word into the stake.

“You really want this?” Yongguk asks, looking up from the stake.

“Right...right here,” Himchan taps his chest, “Here.”

“You don’t have to tell me twice,” Yongguk hisses before taking the stake and plunging it straight into Himchan’s chest.

Himchan makes a loud screeching sound as the pain’s pulsing all over, there’s blood everywhere, and he really really wanted this so he can be pure again. His screams and cries are melodic to Yongguk’s ears.

He tries to sputter out a “thank you”, but his breath’s slipping away and his vision goes black. Yongguk watches his chest rise and fall as he touches the blood that paints it deliciously. Himchan smiles a small smile as his breathing slows, he doesn’t regret this, but Yongguk clearly does. It’s written all over his face.

As Yongguk watched Himchan closely, something inside him told him that he “fucked up” and that he “went too far”. What has been done cannot be undone. He realized way too late that if he kills Himchan now, he’ll be alone for eternity. 

“Don’t leave me,” he mumbles.

“Sudden change of heart...?”

“You can’t leave me again. I won’t be able to take it.”

“Should’ve thought about that...before you shoved this in my chest.”

“You told me to—“

“Thank you for doing so...I’ll be pure again...”

“I wasn’t thinking clearly. The hunger, I just—stay with me, please—“

Himchan gives Yongguk another soft smile before closing his eyes and beginning his journey of rebirth and purity.

In other words, he’s gone.

Yongguk wasn’t in his right mind. He was hungry and upset that Himchan decided to show his face again after leaving him for months to figure out this vampire thing on his own. Something deep inside him snapped, telling him to go off on him. He wasn’t in control. It’s all for a good cause, right? Himchan wanted this all along. It doesn’t feel right. It doesn’t sit well with Yongguk.

Himchan drove himself crazy trying to keep this from happening, and Yongguk knew this. It was inevitably going to happen.

Yongguk doesn’t cry. He watches over Himchan’s lifeless body, carefully climbing off it. He thought he’d get a sense of pride for killing and eating a vampire, but all he feels is shame and nausea.

Yongguk doesn’t cry. He leans in to take the stake out of Himchan’s chest and sets it back on the table. Maybe he’ll use it on himself next. No, he can’t, he’s got a life to live.

Yongguk doesn’t cry. He isn’t too sure what to do with the body. Usually he’d eat everything   
down to the bone, but with Himchan, it’s different.

Yongguk doesn’t cry. Instead, he’ll do the same thing Himchan did, isolating himself from others, locking himself away, starving himself, driving himself crazy, until the end of time. He’s all alone. He’s got Tigger, and that’s it. He doesn’t want to hurt anyone anymore. Himchan wouldn’t have wanted that. 

Yongguk doesn’t cry.


End file.
